Network Confidence
I was BEYOND NERVOUS for the first networking event I went to after leaving my previous role and setting up my business. Largely because it was the first time I had ever been to a networking event and I was scared of the sell. Both the sell from others and my own pitch.
When we’re think about networking it’s common to think everyone else is so much better at it than you, they all know what they’re doing. The same myth is often said about presenting, but more about that another time. The truth is different; yes some people are naturals but most are in the same boat as you,
just getting through the event.
But you can do so much better than that.
Important side note: networking can have a function at any time! It doesn't just have to be about sales, it's also about ideas, connection, personal brand and confidence too.
Here’s some quick tips to be a confident networker:
Set your intention. What are the reasons for you attending the networking? What are you hoping to achieve? Who do you ideally need to talk to? Consider setting yourself a goal, even a small goal of talking to 2 new people, or connecting with 1 person of interest shows real progress.
Prepare Yourself. Make sure you have everything you need from business cards to a fully charged phone (Linkedin QR code exchanges). Scope out the event so you know how to get there and park without last minute stress. Prepare yourself; this could be a good breakfast and plenty of water, it could be some breathing exercises or a mantra that gives you a little boost.
Practice your quick pitch. This doesn’t need to be a formal minute pitch (not all networking events do this now) but the truth is you are networking for a reason, so prepare to pitch that. Because you will likely be asked, “what do you do?” or “why are you here?”.
Storytelling works really well, do you have a great customer story to share. Try that. It helps build an emotional connection.
Focus on who you help, what problems you solve, how you make people feel rather than what YOU do. They are more likely to resonate to that “journey” rather than the minutiae of your services.
Consider working your pitch as questions if this feels more natural to you. As an example you’re an accountant for self employed “How do you feel about year end?” “Absolute dread, weirdly I love it…”
Be curious. One of the best ways to build confidence when networking is to be genuinely interested in the other person and their perspective. Instead of worrying about what to say or how to impress them, focus on listening and learning from them instead. Ask open-ended questions, follow up with relevant comments, and share your own insights and experiences. It’s also a great way to build trust and show your value.
Take inspiration from others. Who do you know that is good at this? What specific elements do you like and why? How could you use this information to influence how you show up at networking? Small changes (including a smile) can make a big difference to how you feel.
Celebrate your progress. This may not be easy for you and celebrating the small steps helps to keep going. You will see the rewards.
It takes time. Remember that you might not always see the rewards in the room so be patient with yourself.
They used to say that people needed to see something 7 times before making a purchase, and this stat is considerably higher in today’s attention economy.
It takes time to build the know, like and trust factor. Look to reflect on the positive input and actions rather than the immediate outcomes.
Your ideal customer or link may not be in the room, but they well know someone who is and networking is great for making connections.
Try to avoid just hanging out with friends. If you’ve been to networking a few times you might bump into the same people, or even see a colleague. It can be easy to use them as a safe zone but you risk missing out on the intentional goals you set yourself. I recommend saying hi and letting them know what your plan is for the event, this gives you momentum and more than likely they will help push you on.
I would recommend avoiding approaching people in pairs who are deep in conversation, or anything where the group is too big (it will be more difficult to achieve your intention and show your value). I often like to ask if I can join the conversation, this gives you a chance to introduce yourself and they may well ask your opinion on the topic being discussed - instant insight and value :)
Let me know what you think of these tips, and go get what you want from your networking.
While on the topic of networks….
When I set up my company I soon realised that life as a business owner can be a pretty lonely place. Looking back the same can be said for my life as a leader too.
Not many of my existing friends understood the different pressures, emotions and mini celebrations. While they could offer some support and a kind ear, what I craved was people who truly understand, who have some of the same battle scars of setting up alone. The same happened when my relationship ended, my close friends were in relationships and at different stages of their lives. So I sought out the type of people I wanted in my network, both professionally and personally. And I would recommend you do the same.
Take some time to reflect on what you might need; people with similar interests, people doing things you dream about, people who can mentor you, whatever you need. And then go out there and look for it.
Remember people love helping others and there is (probably) nothing better than human connection.
What do you need right now?
I’d love to know what you think about this post, drop me an email or a comment below.
If you need more support with this, why not get in touch about my 1:1 coaching? I offer high support and challenge through my leadership and confidence coaching to help you lead a life and career that brings you joy.
