A festive reflection
It truly is the most wonderfully weird time of the year.
Perhaps you’re somewhere in between rushing to get things done, or on go slow (likely exhausted) avoiding any decisions until the next year.
Maybe you’ve already got the decorations up already, have consumed multiple mince pies and everything mulled and are full on Christmas spirit. Maybe you’re a full on scrooge, turning off the festive songs and keeping your head down. Or maybe you’re a little like me, somewhere in the middle and actually feeling a little awkward about it all.
Don’t get me wrong there are aspects of this festive period that I love, but there are lots that make me feel meh and some that invoke an expletive or two 🤬 And I know I am not alone in this. Multiple people I have spoken to recently feel a whole bunch of different feelings over Christmas from family feuds to boozy nights out and politics at the dinner table.
So with this, my last newsletter before the big day, I encourage you to take a few moments and reflect on what you might need. As we head into the festive period consider how you could set your intentions and make it as joyfully you as possible.
First up: What do you need to let go of?
I know personally there are some thoughts I need to let go of, perhaps some of these resonate with you too, << Test First Name >>?
Expectations. What expectations are you holding on to for Christmas and New Year? Are these expectations on yourself, perhaps how you show up? Are they expectations on others, perhaps how they react, perhaps even gift related? What expectations do you feel others have of you and how does this align with what you want? What can you do to let go of this?
Old Scripts. A big one, and something I have talked to a lot of people about recently. Often when we return to the family home or a family tradition we morph back into the person we used to be. I see this in myself, I slip back into playing the little competitive, cantankerous girl. This is not me anymore. We all grow and change, but it can be difficult for new scripts to stand strong in these environments, it can be difficult for others to see and understand the new role.
Judgement. I know I judge myself over the festive period, especially if I drink too much and have hangxiety the next day. There was also certainly a version of myself that was more judgemental, and this can show at times. What judgement are you holding on to? And how can you choose compassion instead?
Comparison. Oof the comparison gremlins can be strong at this time of year. Being honest do you compare even the smallest things at Christmas; decorations, gifts, food creations, money spent? How much of this comparison reflects who you really want to be? How important are these items to you? How can you seek joy instead of comparison? Let me reintroduce you to SHOY and BRAGITUDE (Check out my previous newsletter)
Traditions. The actual definition of a tradition is “a long-established custom or belief that has been passed on from one generation to another.” It’s funny that we don’t necessarily realise the traditions and habits we have as families or groups, until we join another family or group. It’s fair to say that the Angus Christmas is pretty full of food and drink with some slightly loud games at the end of the night. But we can choose to flex traditions, especially if we find ourselves unhappy or hear ourselves saying “We always do it this way, I’m not sure why though”. Are there any traditions that feel uncomfortable for you now? And how can you effect change here?
What do you need to let go of this year?
How will you do this?
How will this make you feel?
And then: What new traditions might you like to build?
I really love the idea of being able to make new traditions whenever we want, romanticising life just for yourself and the ones you are close to. Living alone (apart from Bella dog of course) I am even more aware of this than ever before.
There have been family and friend traditions over Christmas and New Year that have changed over the years (not the order for opening presents though - this will never change! 😂) so what is holding you back from creating some new traditions for you.
Here’s some of my new traditions for Christmas 2023 (so far):
Instead of Secret Santa this year my friends and I are exchanging books (from our personal collection or thrifted) and the plan is to spend time on Christmas Eve reading while eating chocolate.
Christmas movie list. I’m compiling a list of Christmas movies to watch under a blanket with candles, snacks and a glass of red / hot chocolate. Send me your recommendations, please. Although Miracle on 34th Street has a special place in my heart after going to see it with my Dad many many years ago.
Walk (Obviously), I have often gone on walks Christmas day but it’s never been intentional. This year I want to make the time for me and my steps.
What traditions will you set for yourself, your friends, your family this year?
How will these make you feel?
One final tradition I recommend that helps with each of these areas: the habit of gratitude. It helps to not only feel happy in what we have and who we are, but also to understand what makes us thankful and where we might want to spend more time.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on these questions, drop me an email and share with me.
